You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
