'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
