Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
