I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
