The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
this will be a night to untag.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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