she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Randomize
