I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
