OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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