Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
