Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize