haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
