She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize