You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
