am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
