Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
