I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Randomize
