I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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