It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize
