fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
