just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
