you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Randomize
