question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
