your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
