Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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