I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
