you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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