I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
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