just come out here and I will go home with you...
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
