Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
ok first of all what the fuck
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
