I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
