Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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