So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
