then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
