There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Randomize