By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
