I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
