I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
they call him Oral-B. enough said
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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