I didn't shave. On purpose
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
