idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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