All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Drake has all the answers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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