Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
