Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize