I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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