Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
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