i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize