I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
