he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
