okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
