porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
