I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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